Alright. It’s now past Christmas and it’s time for me to reflect on this holiday seasons feelings, blessings, gripes, et al.
Let me start out by saying that over all this Christmas was amazing and unlike any other. Yes it was a bit different being with family again and not being down in California celebrating the holidays with my friends and their families but it was great to be with my own after five years if being absent. It was a blessing to be among everyone and just be able to talk and be ourselves. There were a few occasions where feelings got a little heavy and maybe a little bit too much wine was consumed but other than that I ink that everything went pretty smoothly and I am glad that I was up here to enjoy the holidays and partake in the long time traditions that we have up here but that I was never present for. Like I said a blessing.
The one thing I do wish I had up here was my friends back home. Its been a very interesting past month full of ups and downs and WTF moments. I can’t even begin to try and figure out why things have happened the way they have but they have. I don’t and will never understand being fake and lying to peoples faces and I definitely will never be that person to fake emotion. I can’t do that. I’ve found that while up here that it is the hardest creating withstanding relationships. I have two great friendships here and for that I should be satisfied. I guess I am just used to my large group of good friends in CA and tried so hard to have that up here that I lost myself in making sure that I pleased everyone. Its all coming back to me that friendships should not take work. They should not take tons of effort to make the other person happy. Friendships although complex should be very easy and fluid. With that being said I should not worry about the amount of friends I have but the quality in the ones that I do have. I know for certain that the quality in the friends I currently have in my life is 100 percent amazing and I will no longer focus my energy to please others just to add to a list of acquaintances.
In adding to my reflection of my friends it saddens me that tomorrow one of the most amazing people that I have met while up here is leaving to start his new life chapter in New York. It’s crazy how it all happened so damn fast. It was like a blinked and he was already to leave. Although I am saddened to lose him to another city, I am very happy that he is getting out of his home town and moving on with his life and starting anew. We all need to do that. We need to get away and start fresh and get away from the small town bullshit. Again I am so happy for him and can’t wait to hear about all of the new things that he is experiencing on the east coast.
I am excited to share that on December 31 I will be leaving the area to spend My New Year’s Eve in San Francisco and spend a week there to refresh and be amongst some of my close friends. It will be nice to ring in the new year with some of the people I love and care about and see what new things I can experience. Maybe I can find myself a nice little New Years kiss? Who knows. Again with the new year right around the corner I have many things that I would like to work on and enhance. Just breathing and going with the flow is one of them.
I hope that all of you have had an amazing holiday and that the time spent with your loved ones is cherished. I also hope that you all have an amazing new year and bring it in doing something you love with the people you love. Let’s make 2014 an amazing year and carpe diem.